Logan's Birth Story

as told by Daniel Bu

It was early morning Monday January 3, 2005. It was 7:30 am to be exact. I was getting ready for a day of nose to the grindstone. Gayle, was 8.5 months pregnant and, as usual, was still in bed or so I thought. I was about to walk out the door when suddenly she came out of the bedroom. “I am beginning to efface,” she said proudly clutching one of the myriad of pregnancy reference books that she kept on her bedside table.

The last couple of weeks had been tense ones. In her last couple of exams the doctor had said that her fundal height was a smaller than it should be. She was under the impression that our baby would probably be a few weeks late so that it could continue to grow to a proper golden brown. On there other hand, from what her book said, the bit of discharge that she experienced that morning was a good sign that her labor was preceding right on target for a due date of January 25th. I must admit I responded with a sleepy and half hearted “Congratulations.” Come on, it’s really hard for me to get excited about bodily discharge of any sort especially on a Monday morning. Little did I know that all that was just a portent of the momentous events to come.

So off I went to work and was settling into my typical Monday morning routine when I received a call from Gayle “Guess what. My water broke,” She said with an amused chuckle in her voice. Now being a pregnancy newbie I figured we could still be a few days before the baby would come forth but Gayle quickly let me know that the baby would be on its way in the next 12 hours. “Three weeks early,” I thought to myself. “Three weeks early.” From that moment on till the baby was born there was a little tune that kept playing over and over in my head. It was a song from the musical The Sound of Music. Specifically it is the one line from “Sixteen Going on Seventeen” that says “Totally unprepared am I.” And man oh man I couldn’t have been more right.

I knew that the baby wouldn’t just slide out in an instant like that scene from “Big Fish” so that I had some time to do what I needed to and get home. I quickly gave my co-workers a brief rundown of the projects I had pending, grabbed my stuff and started the hour long train ride home. The entire way home I kept saying to myself if I miss the birth of my son because of BART I will have a massive conniption fit.

Now we had planned to have our little boy in the Birth Home in Pleasanton. We had heard some ugly stories about birthing in a hospital and we had chosen what seemed to be a rather unconventional route. At the Birth Home Gayle would have to have natural child birth with minimal outside intervention during labor. We would have the services of a midwife, the midwife’s apprentice and the doula we hired but no pain relieving drugs, no suctions or surgeries, and no doctors and no hospital. Being somewhat of a cynic and more than a little skeptical I understood why we had chosen to go to the Birth Home but I was more than a little apprehensive. “What if something went wrong,” I asked myself. “What if it all went wrong?” In the end all my apprehensions were completely unfounded. Everything went beautifully and the folks at the Birth Home were magnificent.

By the time I got myself home it was about 12:30 pm, but Gayle had requested that I pick up a few things that she had forgotten. In the meantime, Gayle, Keila and Nichelle Fair had headed up to Pleasanton to see Gayle’s doctor at the Birth Home. Upon checking she was told that she her water had indeed broken and that she would need to have the Baby in the next 24 hours.

Unfortunately she needed to keep walking in order to help the labor progress and she would need to return in a few hours to be checked again. So Keila drove them to Stoneridge Mall to walk Gayle through what would turn out to be the beginning of a day of labor. Being that Gayle was having back labor, everytime that she had a contraction she would double over in pain and Keila would proceed to massage her back quite forcefully until the pain went away.

In the meantime I had grabbed the stuff we needed (toothbrush, toothpaste, a change of clothes etc.) and headed to Pleasanton. I arrived at the Birth Home shortly before 2:30 pm when Gayle was scheduled to be checked again. After being examined the midwife let her know that while the labor was progressing nicely she was not in active labor, therefore, she could not stay as yet. Gayle would need to go out and walk some more and return about 2 hours later. So we reluctantly headed out to walk through downtown Pleasanton for the next two hours.

Those two hours were not fun. Gayle would walk about ten steps and double over from the pain. Keila and I took turns massaging her back to alleviate the distress until the contraction ended and then off we would walk again. We decided at this point to call Holly, our doula. We figured that we would need Holly’s expertise soon. We were right.

We would set little goals for ourselves: let us walk until we get to the next bench or flower pot, whatever Gayle could lean over on during a contraction. At one point we completely miscalculated the distance to our next place to lean with her next contraction and poor Gayle ended up on all fours in the middle of the sidewalk with Keila leaning behind her trying to massage the pain away. Then about an hour and a half into our tour of downtown Pleasanton Gayle frantically leaned over a garbage can and promptly emptied the contents of her stomach. After that we gathered ourselves up and headed back to the Birth Home. At this point Gayle was pretty tired and we were hoping that she would be far enough along that she would be able to stay at the Birth Home.

Unfortunately, upon examination the midwife discovered that while she had progressed quite a bit she was still not in active labor. We would have to find a place to go. I must admit, seeing Gayle in the midst of her painful contractions and the crestfallen expression on her face when she was told that she could not stay at the Birth Home and rest made my blood boil. Then Danaya, the midwife’s apprentice said that while she could understand why we were upset we needed to understand that if she did not remain active it would prolong her labor and make the situation worse.

By now it was pretty dark and it had begun to rain. Walking around on the street was not an option. So Keila, called her husband Jason, and had him find us a nearby hotel. By this time Holly met us at the Birth Home and helped us get our stuff together to get to the hotel.

Gayle was still having some pretty uncomfortable contractions and found it difficult to sit in the car. Every time she had a contraction the motion of the vehicle made it much, much worse. So every few minutes I was scrambling to pull over by the side of the road and Holly, who was following behind us, had to scramble to make sure she stuck with us. It was a miracle that we didn’t end up getting into an accident while we weaved back and forth from contraction to contraction.

Finally we arrived at the Sierra Suites. Jason had found a beautiful hotel room for us and we quickly settled in. Keila grabbed the phone book and ordered us some pizzas. Holly, on the other hand, set herself to do something remarkable. She was going to try to turn the baby around. Gayle’s back labor had been bad enough but having active back labor would be excruciating. Holly directed Gayle to get on the bed on all fours. Then slowly she began massaging her this way and that. Then she had her squat down on the bed, then on the toilet. Some positions seemed rather odd but it was obvious that there was nothing random about the technique. Holly was methodically using all of her skills to turn the baby around. Finally Gayle had a strong contraction on the toilet but something was different. The back pain was not nearly as pronounced! The baby had turned around.

Finally 9 pm rolled around and it was time to head back to the Birth Home. We were reluctant to go. The room at the hotel was comfortable and Gayle was dreading the 10 minute car ride back. However there was no choice. Gayle needed to be given a dosage of medicine to ensure the baby’s safety. So while Keila checked out of the hotel, Holly, Gayle and I were off in Holly’s car. Unfortunately Gayle was the only one with any sense of direction and she was otherwise engaged. We made a wrong turn and the 10 minute trip turned into a 25 minute ordeal. The motion made Gayle’s contractions worse. Eventually, Gayle through her pain managed to get us back on track and we arrived at the Birth Home.

Upon arriving we were dreading being told that we would have to go away again because Gayle’s labor had not progressed enough. We were all tired and ready to get this over with. Michelle, our midwife, checked Gayle and our fears were laid to rest. Gayle was in active labor!

We called Keila to let her know. She promptly checked out of the hotel and joined us at the Birth Home. By that time it was after 11PM. Michelle checked Gayle again and told us that Gayle could use the Birthing tub. The warm water helped alleviate some of the pain that Gayle felt in her back. While Holly, Keila, Danaya and Michelle tag teamed to assist Gayle with her contractions, I held Gayle’s hand. I wanted to create a relaxing environment for Gayle so I used the so I pulled out my cds and played all my mellow stuff, “Dance with my Father” by Luther Vandross and John Mayer’s “Heavier Things”, on the little stereo in the birthing room.

Then Michelle told Gayle that it was time to push. All this time Gayle was being encouraged to breathe through the contractions but now it was different. Instead of bearing the pain she was to use it to get the baby out. At this point you could look in the water during one of her contractions and see the top of the baby’s head. To our surprise he had a thick head of dark black hair. With each contraction Gayle would feel his head crown and then when she stopped pushing it would slide back. As this continued for awhile we could tell that she was getting tired and more than a little frustrated. The birthing team was encouraging Gayle to push with her contractions but to rest in between, but Gayle was eager to push the baby out. It was time to change the music. During a brief lull in the action I ran out and switched the CD from the mellow tones of Luther and John Mayer to the driving beat of Justin Timberlake. When she heard the beginning of “Like I Love You” she smiled and said Renee is going to get a kick out of this. It is her CD after all.

After pushing in the tub awhile, we noticed that Gayle was having trouble bracing herself in the slippery tub to push effectively. So Michelle suggested we move back to the bed. While in the bed, Michelle and Danaya, helped Gayle get in various positions to maximize her pushing. Danaya assisted by using almond oil to make sure that Gayle did not tear while pushing. Keila and Holly were right there to make sure someone was rubbing her back to alleviate the pain and we were all lending voices of encouragement. All the while I could hear Gayle say, “I can totally do this. I can totally do this.”

Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, Gayle pushed one last time and our little boy slid out. I was instantly amazed. He did not look like the misshapen, alien, conehead that everyone told me to expect. He was amazing with beautiful dark hair and eyes. I was stunned. We were so busy cooing and oohing and ahhing, that we forgot that Gayle couldn’t see him. So at her request I took my slimy little guy and held him up for her to see. The smile on her face was priceless. In the midst of our reverie someone ask us what is his name. We had been debating Logan Samuel or Samuel Logan. Gayle said that she still wasn’t sure. So I reminded her that while she was in the throes of labor she always referred to him as Logan. In her mind, whether she realized it or not, his name was Logan. So at that moment we decided: on January 4, 2005 at 4:26 am Logan Samuel Bu was born.

At 4:41 am, a mere fifteen minutes later, his daddy laid upon a nearby sofa and unable to bear it any longer, promptly fell asleep.